Ep. 33 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

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Get tickets to Tom Segura's Charity Zoom Event here: givebutter.com/lls-tom-segura
Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer start off this episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave by to rebrand the infamous hashtag coined by Tom all those years ago. Tom suggests three new options to replace it. They also discuss Bert's most recent discovery: Nadav has red hair! Who knew? Tom shares a story of touring Dr. Dre's old house, which leads Bert to pitch a show in which they would tour celebrity houses and guess whose it is. They talk to Taran from Taran Tactical on the phone about gun laws in various states. The Bears also discuss Lance Armstrong, Bert's upcoming drive-in movie theater tour, and sign language interpreters.

  • Bert smells like a bunch of dudes came inside him

    foohousekr1foohousekr13 օր առաջ
  • WoW, Thanks for the information! You can also check amworlds.info/up/qhG0Bg6oPSNdEDp82SOXMQ

    amy morganamy morgan5 օր առաջ
  • Jump cut

    Gage MainusGage Mainus8 օր առաջ
  • I'm soooooooooo curious about the third one that bert wouldn't even let be mentioned?????

    Joe HoneggerJoe Honegger15 օր առաջ
  • The show Bert is talking about making with the houses has been done in the U.K. in the 90’s, it was called “ through the key hole”

    Mr SpackoMr Spacko19 օր առաջ
  • My first thought after the jump cut was “#OsamaBertLaden”

    Zachary GoinsZachary Goins22 օր առաջ
  • 11:27 thats me with my grades, and my friends ask me, "wHaT dId YoU gEt??" and genuinely don't know because I avoid it

    A GIA GI26 օր առաջ
  • #33 walking in back yard naked is fine until you noticed some guy watching you But did you have to add race of him? RACIST?

    Franklin EnnoFranklin EnnoԱմիս առաջ
  • ...plus it's kinda HARD curing a PANDEMIC of CORONAVIRIS when your DUMBASS President gets rid of every3 to save you - CDC , reversing Obama's regulations. So now we have more hurricanes, warmer climates, etc. I think he wants to be the LAST president...

    Franklin EnnoFranklin EnnoԱմիս առաջ
  • 2 bears...9-20-2020-over 200,000 have died of CORONAVIRIS with no cure yet...

    Franklin EnnoFranklin EnnoԱմիս առաջ
  • Considering Bert can barely read or control his life, I find it hard to believe he runs multiple miles. I think he thinks he runs 4 miles, but is really only running 4 minutes. When I frequented the gym, 6 days a week, when I was around 180-190 and 21 years old, I could barely run 2 miles. He's a straight liar.

    notQwatwafflenotQwatwaffleԱմիս առաջ
  • Bert's Brain: Keep up with me alright? Bert's mouth: 25 Bert's Brain: wha- Bert's mouth: Lance Jordan

    Mr. KMr. KԱմիս առաջ
  • 3 months in and I still want to know what the edited rumor about Bert Kreischer was. Lol.

    kawaiiafangirlkawaiiafangirlԱմիս առաջ
  • when bert said" im locked and loaded one in the chamber" i really wanted him to say whiskey cock glock dog

    Cesar LopezCesar LopezԱմիս առաջ
  • @1:10:27 for funniest moment of the pod

    Cole PidcockCole PidcockԱմիս առաջ
  • is no one gonna talk about the sign language bit

    Cole PidcockCole PidcockԱմիս առաջ
  • Bert fat

    David ThilenDavid ThilenԱմիս առաջ
  • Stop with the private conversations! It's crazy annoying.

    Angela SamellsAngela SamellsԱմիս առաջ
  • The thing about Lance Armstrong is that he wasn't the only one who was doping. Everyone, Everyone that was in the tour between 1990 and 2010 did it 2. Why not just let them blood dope. Who gives a fuck?

    Only_SonOnly_SonԱմիս առաջ
  • 2mo the later, still no mass casualties!

    Deanna GlazaDeanna GlazaԱմիս առաջ
  • Night "MARE" Bert... "MARE!" NOT "MEER!"

    mtgAzimmtgAzimԱմիս առաջ
  • I'd love to hear the third #

    Nath0 19XXNath0 19XXԱմիս առաջ
  • I'd love to hear the third #

    Nath0 19XXNath0 19XXԱմիս առաջ
  • Ease up on the commercials guys.

    Angela SamellsAngela SamellsԱմիս առաջ
  • Bert’s sign language closed captions would say I really enjoyed my first anal experience and was life changing

    cncdan 13cncdan 132 ամիս առաջ
  • Leechburg pa!!! Riverside driver in

    cncdan 13cncdan 132 ամիս առաջ
  • It wasn’t obvious though because the first top 20 riders all did it. He was just better. He wasn’t going to let himself get beat because ppl were cheating to beat him. So he did it to. Everyone loved baseball in the 90s and early 2000s

    cncdan 13cncdan 132 ամիս առաջ
  • "raise em right, I gotta go..."😂😂

    frank ruschmannfrank ruschmann2 ամիս առաջ
  • “Raise ‘em right... I’ve gotta go.” - Tom Segura

    Christopher PriceChristopher Price2 ամիս առաջ
  • Bert's ASL interpretting skills are on point!

    Matt FisherMatt Fisher2 ամիս առաջ
  • Damn I wish we saw that 3rd one 😭

    Edison MedicineEdison Medicine2 ամիս առաջ
  • George Floyd was not murdered

    invo 7invo 72 ամիս առաջ
  • Bert reads like he smells. Shitty

    Jake cozzzJake cozzz2 ամիս առաջ
  • How amazing would it be if Jim gaffigan was on this podcast and it's 3 bears one cave. He would be a polar bear 😅

    Daniel GensollenDaniel Gensollen2 ամիս առաջ
  • How about #DirtyButtBert

    Phillip CassadyPhillip Cassady2 ամիս առաջ
  • This is 2 of my favorite comedians! Keep it up guys

    Chris SwinsonChris Swinson2 ամիս առաջ
  • He stinks.

    ParkentParkent2 ամիս առաջ
  • 1:02:16

    Nave BushesNave Bushes2 ամիս առաջ
  • I wonder what Bert Kreischer is doing right now

    Nave BushesNave Bushes2 ամիս առաջ
  • 58:26 I think you mean ASL translators, not ALS (Lou Gehrig’s Disease) Bert lol

    Jonathan MejiaJonathan Mejia2 ամիս առաջ
  • I like Bert's new show idea. It's like Room Raiders from MTV except you aren't trying to just "bang the hot one".

    Mitch SwartoutMitch Swartout2 ամիս առաջ
  • its not peaceful though is it lol

    Ronaldo LelisRonaldo Lelis2 ամիս առաջ
  • wopw

    CheddarCheddar2 ամիս առաջ
  • Bert "the most racist comic in the world" Kreischer: "I LOVE profiling people"

    MBA2804MBA28042 ամիս առաջ
  • That "walking around a house and guess what celebrity lives there" is already a TV program in Denmark. It's called *Kender du type* (do you know the type). the Danish program isn't great, but I think it could be awesome with you two.

    Bjørn SjøgrenBjørn Sjøgren2 ամիս առաջ
  • I am not deaf but hard of hearing. Bert what I took from what you said was that either you are happy for massage chairs and thank God for it or you experienced a earth quake and and are sarcastically smiling at God like what the heck was that for. Nonetheless you had me laughing my butt off. Thank you for that. 😂

    Kayla BearKayla Bear3 ամիս առաջ
  • jump cut was a stab in the chest

    Ed BarrazaEd Barraza3 ամիս առաջ
  • I believe the last one they cut was either #bertsnotaracist or #bertlovescuminsidehim.

    CrankyWinter43CrankyWinter433 ամիս առաջ
  • I'm sad I commented that beert does something to dogs and smells like another thing on another video and I didn't really mean what I said.

    BenjaminBenjamin3 ամիս առաջ
    • My mom says I know how to focus on things better than many other people because I have an ability.

      BenjaminBenjamin3 ամիս առաջ
    • By the way I'm artistic.

      BenjaminBenjamin3 ամիս առաջ
  • I don’t wanna live in a world without Bert. Please out live me.

    Mad Mike0082Mad Mike00823 ամիս առաջ
  • bart smells like caca

    sumbaldsumbald3 ամիս առաջ
  • I'm the same way, I know half Bert's stories are filled with bullshit buy I don't care, I just wanna believe that all this hit can happen to one person

    Ashley LeavittAshley Leavitt3 ամիս առաջ
  • I'll hear Tool's laugh from 22:00 in my nightmeres

    Paige TurnerPaige Turner3 ամիս առաջ
  • 🇨🇺🇨🇺🇨🇺🇨🇺

    Aa KhaleesiAa Khaleesi3 ամիս առաջ
  • do the house show lol

    Nikolaus RiggiNikolaus Riggi3 ամիս առաջ
  • are they really not gay?

    Who YouWho You3 ամիս առաջ
  • I don’t understand how Bert keeps his friends when he’ll never let anyone but himself speak regardless of how far someone is into a story. Have some respect man

    Lorne KochLorne Koch3 ամիս առաջ
    • Joe Rogan and Tom talk about the people that do this and how it drives them crazy on the YMH podcast, oddly enough Bert's name is never mentioned lmao

      d. flynnd. flynn3 ամիս առաջ
  • The house show already exists - “Through the keyhole” , maybe just a UK thing

    Matthew RichardsonMatthew Richardson3 ամիս առաջ
    • DAMMIT,.. you beat me to it!!! (Imagine Keith Lemon and Bert trying to have a conversation)

      Steve HuntSteve Hunt2 ամիս առաջ
  • The funniest thing was just seeing Bert wheeze and yell jump cut repeatedly while wondering what it could have said.

    Zach WrightZach Wright3 ամիս առաջ
  • In canada you can go to jail for killing a home invader. Unless you can prove that your life was at risk.

    BirdOfHermes83 D.BirdOfHermes83 D.3 ամիս առաջ
  • CA is a stand your ground law state. But, key factor is fear of imminent danger of great bodily harm and or death to yourself and or others (family, etc...)

    Vinny OrVinny Or3 ամիս առաջ
  • Bert “100%” Kreischer

    Randy Ray Jr.Randy Ray Jr.3 ամիս առաջ
  • 58:20 ALS translators lmao.

    JCWJCW3 ամիս առաջ
  • Man tell me it was #BertHatesBlacks

    Travis HowellTravis Howell3 ամիս առաջ
  • So bert's not racist? But he smells like a hot pile of trash?

    Dillon MannDillon Mann3 ամիս առաջ
  • #BertisAntiSemitic

    BoredHubBoredHub3 ամիս առաջ
  • Bert's suggestion for the show already exists - Through the Keyhole!

    ph328ph3283 ամիս առաջ
  • Bert, is that a Louisville Mashers hat???

    Daniel YountDaniel Yount3 ամիս առաջ
  • Of course Bert would load his gun ready to defend his family without knowing if he was in the right to do so. California has a home protection bill of rights. That means if an intruder (a non-household member) made an unlawful, forcible entry into a home, the residents automatically have good reason to believe they are about to be killed or face serious bodily injury, but if the intruder fleas or you injure him you can't follow up with a fatal blow because in the laws mind you have neutralized the situation.

    Matt AbercrombieMatt Abercrombie3 ամիս առաջ
  • I hate how Bart Kristler tries to normalize bigotry in our society as if George Floyd never even happened

    nyk31nyk313 ամիս առաջ
  • I sometimes wake up feeling really sorry for LeeAnn.

    Marco M.Marco M.3 ամիս առաջ
  • When I listen to Rogan I feel like I learn and become smarter and wiser. This show is okay too.

    David KDavid K3 ամիս առաջ
  • i just muted the part about sign language, i got "death by gun. go to heaven"

    lucky charms666lucky charms6663 ամիս առաջ
  • In California we are legally required to try to escape your home you can’t protect your family if you had a way out and they didn’t without possible legal and civil actions taken against you. The laws that prevent you from this are the Castle doctrine and stand your ground law those laws remove the “duty to retreat” every other state would require and protect you from civil cases

    Richard KlangRichard Klang3 ամիս առաջ
  • Don’t let small business open for 3+ months but millions of people put themselves in close to the best scenario to spread COVID and no one says a dam thing and we will have a 2nd shut down millions more will loose there jobs and people will go hungry with no ability to get a job

    Richard KlangRichard Klang3 ամիս առաջ
  • That guy who's training Bert with guns sounds like a psycho lol

    Aidan GillardAidan Gillard4 ամիս առաջ
  • 34:40 Bert Stutter

    AuroraAurora4 ամիս առաջ
  • 1:10:30 made me shoot my drink out of my nose lmao

    Tyler WhiteTyler White4 ամիս առաջ
  • relax man. you are a comic its fine ok its fine

    CHUGCHUG4 ամիս առաջ
  • #BertHatesN.....s

    Alex fAlex f4 ամիս առաջ
  • @nadav leak the third rebrand for bart

    Laurențiu MureșanLaurențiu Mureșan4 ամիս առաջ
  • "Bert doesn't smell bad at all." - the girl born without nostrils

    David Sky WalkerDavid Sky Walker4 ամիս առաջ
  • I was at that Nirvana concert, too. When they played Smells Like Teen Spirit, Kurt Cobain dedicated the song to everyone except Bert Kreischer.

    David Sky WalkerDavid Sky Walker4 ամիս առաջ
  • A fun game would be to guess, in the comment section, what the #Bertisaracist replacement is they cut out.

    Ryan JacksonRyan Jackson4 ամիս առաջ
  • I alway knew Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer were gay.

    Tim MacTim Mac4 ամիս առաջ
  • Do you think Burnt keeps moving houses because, A. The ASPCA keeps chasing him out for fucking the neighbors dogs, or B. The paint keeps peeling off the walls within a year cause of his smelly ass?

    Bennable WoodersBennable Wooders4 ամիս առաջ
  • Lol, I bet the third kne was "Bert Touches Kids"

    Brendan BrownBrendan Brown4 ամիս առաջ
  • Anyone who did the black square was a complete retard tbh

    Nightflight to erotic cityNightflight to erotic city4 ամիս առաջ
  • This episode made me glad I’m not famous.

    Mike PilesMike Piles4 ամիս առաջ
  • brert "clears throat after every sentence" crenshaw

    Beeb BeebsonBeeb Beebson4 ամիս առաջ
  • bert really screwed the pooch on this episode

    Beeb BeebsonBeeb Beebson4 ամիս առաջ
  • Thank you Tom Segura, you have opened my eyes and got me connected to the Lymphoma Society. My dad is going through chemotherapy for Lymphoma now, he is in good spirits and really hates that baseball is not on. Our family is trying to keep him happy and attended to since Ol' Rona is being a real hooker right now and we cannot be around my Dad at all. You, Christina, Joe ROgan and Bert have been keeping me sane and I thank you. #bertsmellsbad

    Blaklist FingerboardsBlaklist Fingerboards4 ամիս առաջ
  • Your gun law expert did not sound very smart 😂

    Brent AndersonBrent Anderson4 ամիս առաջ
  • Who’s the fucker that scream laughs in the background every time Bert blinks

    Jakob MorningstarJakob Morningstar4 ամիս առաջ
  • Knowing that Bart Chrysler is a gun owner scares seven shades of shit out of me.

    t_st_s4 ամիս առաջ
  • Bert smells like his dog came in him

    Asher StageAsher Stage4 ամիս առաջ
  • Bert, "All of the ALS translators..." haha ASL, ALS, Same Same.

    Cory SullivanCory Sullivan4 ամիս առաջ
  • It's amazing Bert was able to fit a burning cross in his tiny yard.

    Witch KingWitch King4 ամիս առաջ
  • "...his little ginger ass..." --Bert

    Shelly BellyShelly Belly4 ամիս առաջ
  • My girl says she guarantees my Bert smells like cheese and his mouth smells like hot garbage

    Kyle PerreaultKyle Perreault4 ամիս առաջ